Pride Month: Self-Acceptance & Finding Your Pride

Pride Month is here! I am someone that does not identify as gay or bi-sexual, so I had never really connected with Pride Month. The more that time has gone on, I have realized that Pride Month is so much more than just for people who identify as gay or bi-sexual.

It is about supporting fellow human beings who haven’t always been accepted for their lifestyle, and that has given me more of a connection with Pride Month. I am someone who now accepts my crossdressing lifestyle and loves the community that I have discovered.

Accepting Myself

As is the case with many of us, I have not always accepted who I was. I have tried to repress these crossdressing or feminine feelings for most of my life. I have even gone through phases where I made excuses as to why it was okay for me to dress up in my room without anyone knowing or to paint my nails. But even with that, I was never accepting myself, I was just trying to justify it for myself so I didn’t feel as much guilt or self-hatred.

Guilt has been a theme for my relationship with crossdressing for my entire life. It took me a while to recognize the connection with how my parents would talk to me when my crossdressing habit was discovered as a teen. It was a lot of telling me that I shouldn’t dress like that, or I shouldn’t steal other people’s clothing. Some of it was valid, I should not have stolen clothes from others, but I felt like I had no choice to be able to express my femininity. But with all of that, came the guilt of feeling like I was broken or wrong for my urges to wear a dress.

When I finally came to the point of going to therapy for how I felt, it was mostly helpful for me to understand where all my feelings of guilt and self-hatred came from. I explored all of it and vocalized it all for the first time, it was very freeing. It also gave me someone who was accepting of me and didn’t judge me for what I enjoyed, but just listened to me and told me that my feelings were totally valid.

My journey to self-acceptance has been long and filled with purges and urges. I can finally say that I am fully accepting of my lifestyle. I am a crossdresser who loves dresses and painted nails. I am a husband to a beautiful wife whom I love very much, and I am so happy she has been supportive. I am happy about who I have turned into over the last year and feel very proud about my progress toward self-acceptance.

Find your Pride

Pride Month means different things to different people. Some people use Pride Month to support their family members in the LGBTQ+ community. Some people use it as motivation to come out to loved ones for the first time. Others use it as an excuse to wear rainbow outfits and party each weekend in June (I do not judge any of those people by the way). I feel that everyone in the LGBTQ+ community needs to find out what “Pride Month” means to them.

For me, it is a reminder that I am not alone in this world of individuals who do not conform to traditional gender roles or conformity. I am a man, but I am emotional. I am a man, but I look damn good in a dress and heels. I am a man, but I enjoy exploring more submissive roles in the bedroom with my wife. These are things that I don’t brag about to the people who know me, but I brag about them to myself. I am able to be this open-minded person that I am proud of being. I have grown to be more accepting of all other lifestyles and types of people. It has allowed me to grow so much as a person, and I am very proud of that.

Pride Month doesn’t mean that you need to come out to everyone in your life, but you can if you want to. Pride Month doesn’t mean that you need to start your gender transition, but you can if you want to. Pride Month doesn’t mean that you need to attend a Pride Parade or Pride Night at your local bar, but you can if you want to. You can do anything YOU want to do in order to express your Pride, and that is what is wonderful about Pride Month. Enjoying the celebration of feeling Pride in your lifestyle and who you are. So you decide your Pride!

My Goals

I have a few goals for myself for this Pride Month, but if I do not achieve them this month, that doesn’t mean that I will give up on them. I have also been so busy with my career this year, and I am aware that some of these goals may need to be moved to next year’s Pride Month.

My first goal is to use my time to begin working out more to target a more feminine physique. It will not happen in a month, but I want to start the routine to achieve this goal this month. I want to get into pilates and targeted workouts to flatten my stomach and build my booty out more. I think a goal like this will go a long way for my crossdressing expression in the future, and how good I feel in my body.

My second goal is to plan for my next outing as Catie. I had to cancel an outing recently, and it was very disappointing, but I need to plan another one to move on from that feeling. It is challenging with how busy I have been, but at least at some point this summer, I would like to go out, maybe to the gay bar I went to in April, and just spend time as Catie.

My mid-term goal would be to try to pass as a woman at some point this year. I have kept my beard for almost 10 years now, and it will be hard for me (and my wife) to see me without the facial hair, but I would love to be able to go out in public and try to pass as a woman.

I don’t know if I will like it, but until I try, I will never know. So my goal during Pride Month for this is really just to plan out when I will do this and start getting excited for it.

Lastly, this will probably be next year, but I would like to go to a Pride Party or Parade while crossdressed. Just to show my Pride and support for others. It would be something that I could check off my bucket list of crossdressing things, and it would feel wonderful to be around accepting people.

Final Thoughts

Pride Month is individual, but at the same time, it is about community. A community coming together to support each other and express love for each other. I am so happy to see LGBTQ+ people expressing themselves every day. It is so inspirational and heartwarming to me. I have Pride in all of us for being beautiful and loving human beings on this planet.

Have Pride and be happy, this month and forever!

Happy Pride Month to all!